#Fantasyme josh smashtunes series#

When you can be questioned for continuing to live. Me: “I just love him so much, he’s my everyth-”Īhh marriage. Let’s get married and have kids so instead of doing fun stuff on the weekend we can go to a kid’s birthday party where everyone coughs. Me: Mmmmmm…and make sure my yoga pants are in there. Him: How many bottles of shampoo do you need? Newlyweds: Our love will be strong & unapologetic Get married so you can fail miserably at fulfilling new expectations your wife silently sets for you each and every day. Wife: …in charge while I go to the grocery store Me: Oh thank god I’m not the only one that felt this was over Me: That when our kids eat dinner they don’t leave any crumbs under the table.

#Fantasyme josh smashtunes series#

My husband’s sole purpose in life is to have me explain the entire plot of a TV series while I’m trying to watch the last 20 minutes. Husband got excited thinking I was touching myself under the covers but I was actually just opening a Kit Kat I didn’t wanna share.ĭoes my husband think I’m manipulative? Only when I want him to.ĭinner time with kids is great if you like spending 60 minutes trying to change the subject from Minecraft. Not so much “in sickness and in health,” but more “in back-seat driving and open-mouth chewing.” If you hold your newborn baby up to your ear, you can hear your friends having fun without you. Wife: Let’s fool around after the kids go to bed Luckily, there are a lot of funny people on Twitter who also understand the struggle of being married with kids:

It means arguing about what you’re going to eat and what you’ll watch on TV until one of you dies. It means “getting lucky” is more likely to refer to sleeping through the night than having sex. Being married with kids means you probably don’t know what day it is, but you’re sure you’re the only person who ever bothers to refill the filtered water. First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes baby and the endless tweet material.